You know what the best thing about turning forty has been for me? Not wearing any of these adorable jeans – ever again!
I put them on one last time for this super exciting photo shoot after not wearing any pants with a button on them for nearly a year and a half. I thought they looked kind of awesome.
In my teens, twenties, and even into my thirties, jeans were my go-to pants for nearly every occasion. They can be dressed up or dressed down. They even give me a bit of a booty, and show off my tiny curves. Plus, they go with just about everything.
But they have always done something else too…something I used to be willing to ignore for the sake of fashion. They made me feel like I had a boa constrictor wrapped around my tummy and climbing up my crotch (Not in a good way!) I would secretly unbutton them just to eat a meager salad and from the moment I put them on, thoughts of tearing them off consumed me. I’m pretty sure I’ve left behind a good time on more than one occasion just so I could go home and put on some comfy cozies.
Thankfully, something absolutely magical happened as I approached forty. I stopped caring about stupid things as much. I learned that enjoying my time and the people I am with, is far more important than how good my butt looks. Far. More. Important.
I’ve noticed most of my other girlfriends also started to change as they approached their forties. It’s like Mother Nature knew we needed an extra dose of happy. Our joints are just beginning to creak and our faces are sporting more lines and spots, but our souls break free. We instinctively put greater value on what matters.
A few weeks back, I asked my fabulous Facebook buddies to tell me some of the best things they have noticed or learned since zooming in close or breezing past the big Four O. Smart ladies that they are, they had some great advice and heartfelt lessons to share. Here’s what they wrote:
I’ve learned to trust my gut, always, and to stop apologizing for who I am. I’ll add this: Beauty really does derive from within, and from happiness. Our passions are everything. They won’t fail us if we trust them. – August McLaughlin
Don’t be concerned what other people think. Do what feels right in your heart. All people are doing the best they can. – Reena Jordan Reilly
Happiness is a choice!!!! Not something that just happens to you. – Victoria Ronningen
Sex is not love…it’s just sex…don’t choose a life partner soley on that! – Kathryn Bedbury
Your voice is worthy, strong and worth hearing. If you have something to say, say it. – Asavari Phadnis
The people who aren’t nice to you/ignore you/are cliquey aren’t people you’d want to be friends with anyway. If you WERE part of their group you’d be shunning someone else and that’s not who you are! (This has been a huge lesson for me.) – Danielle Levinson Beres
Do for others, without expecting anything back. The act of being kind is enough, otherwise you might be disappointed. – Shellene Mueller
Beauty (in the commercial sense) is overrated, really good friends are far and few between, don’t forget the people that really care about you. When one big event is over, start planning the next, time goes by so fast, don’t get too caught up in your mistakes (mostly you are the only one that notices them… don’t tell on yourself, likely no one noticed but you. – Mariea Henry
I was super shy as a child and teen. Always thought I was different from everyone. Now I have realized that pretty much everyone like they are different and don’t quite fit in. My lifestyle now however, is different than my peer. Now I just could care less what anyone thinks. My son’s opinion is the only one that matters. – Nicole Lyons
Something that resonated with me lately was, “It is not about getting what you want, it is about wanting what you already got.” It reminded me that it is easy to get caught up in the quest for more or the next thing instead of enjoying the present. – Cindy Franklin Katz
And when it comes to dating… If a man wants to meet at his place for a first date, you can tell him to f*** off and go pay for it! – Susannah Cernojevich
What has changed for you for the better??? We want to know.
P.S. I gave one of those uncomfortable pairs of jeans to my BFF after the photo shoot. She totally rocks them out…so glad they are no longer torturing me or taking up space in my closet when they can be enjoyed by someone who appreciates them.
There’s so much to love about this post, Holly. It’s as funny and insightful as you are. Thanks for including me in your awesome list!
I still love jeans (when they fit well!), but have definitely learned to kick un-comfy fashion to the curb. My #HeelFree campaign has been ultra empowering. 🙂
Love this Holly! Time to enjoy the wisdom we have all accumulated 🙂
What a great post!! It’s fun, funny, and has lots of great wisdom. LOVE it!
Thanks Shelly, and thanks for reading!
No kidding Cindie 🙂
Thanks for participating August. I’ve been following your campaign. I feel the same way you do about jeans, as long as they fit, I love them…I also love that you’re over wearing something that doesn’t make you feel good.